PAT HOLLAND
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B I O
Pat Holland joined Dudefest.com out of peer pressure. His first article was pure garbage, and he threw it directly into the trash. All of his subsequent ones were even worse, but since he promised he'd write something, he had no choice but to post them out of guilt.

All of his hilarious opinions and clever sayings are entirely his doing. Anything that you think was stupid or lame is your own fault for obviously misunderstanding him. Please direct all complaints directly to the GROUND, because you suck and Pat's awesome.

This description of the greatest writer in human history has elected to exclude all discussion of his noteworthy sexual prowess (except this one) due to lack of relevance. Seriously, though, the ladies - you don't know what you're missing. (Both ladies that do know what they're missing please ignore this paragraph.)
Shit Written By Pat Holland
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OPINION
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DOZEN
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DUDE
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FORUM
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DOZEN
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CINEMA
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DOZEN
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GUYDE
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DOZEN
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GUYDE
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GUYDE
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DOZEN
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RANT
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DOZEN
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DUDE
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FORUM
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DOZEN
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CINEMA
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GUYDE
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CINEMA
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RANT
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FORUM
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DOZEN
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CINEMA
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CINEMA
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GUYDE
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FORUM
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DOZEN
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DUDE
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CINEMA
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CINEMA
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DOZEN
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GUYDE
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DUDE
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CINEMA
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DOZEN
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CINEMA
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FORUM
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DOZEN
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RANT
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DUDE
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DUDE
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CINEMA
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FORUM
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Recent Activity
RECENT RATINGS
over 3 years ago
Hey, what a great movie. It could only get better with some sequels, right!?
8.5 for BACK TO THE FUTURE
over 3 years ago
Seeing this movie taught me that Arena Football is actually the SECOND shittiest thing with "Arena" in the name.
1 for ARENA
over 3 years ago
I went into the theater stoked to see the prequel to 27 DRESSES. I was sorely disappointed.
6 for 22 JUMP STREET
over 3 years ago
I fucking hate bowling.
5.5 for 27 DRESSES
over 3 years ago
I'm surprised that these movies keep coming out, and keep making money. That said, I can't wait for TRANS5MERS.
6 for TRANSFORMERS: AGE OF EXTINCTION
over 3 years ago
The soundtrack needs more P. Diddy, but the rest of the movie had exactly the right amount of Matthew Broderick.
6 for GODZILLA
over 3 years ago
I'm just really impressed at how good of a shot those apes were, they had never held a gun before
7.5 for RISE OF THE FALL OF THE DAWN OF THE PLANET OF THE APES
over 3 years ago
They should have called this movie FREON FLUX, because of how COOL it is! But no, it actually sucks.
2 for ÆON FLUX
over 3 years ago
JENNIFER LAWRENCE! SHE'S AMAAAAAAZING! Come for the booty, stay because the movie's great.
8 for X-MEN: DAYS OF FUTURE PAST
over 3 years ago
I reasonably doubt that any of you have seen this.
3 for REASONABLE DOUBT
RECENT COMMENTS
over 3 years ago
Did you know that one of the symptoms of an MDMA overdose is double commenting?
on On Wes Welker, Molly, and the Kentucky Fucking Derby
over 3 years ago
BB means "bareback"
on Tinder
over 3 years ago
It was a huge oversight on my part to not include the chick from the AT&T commercials. The one that plays an AT&T retail store employee. That one....
on Hottest Chicks From Commercials
over 3 years ago
My theory is that ROCKY IV is why clapping was invented. People loved it so much they couldn't stop giving themselves high fives, and applause was...
on Best ROCKY Movies
over 3 years ago
I hope you saved that popcorn and soda for later. Throwing it away is wasteful.
on Review of X-MEN: DAYS OF FUTURE PAST
over 3 years ago
Ain't even care. I'd use it right here if the comments allowed adding images.
on Winning
over 3 years ago
Here's my newest article: The Dudefest Guyde to Replying to Comments. Step 1: Click "Reply" There is no Step 2
on Getting Laid at Farmer's Markets
over 3 years ago
Hey it's not my fault if you don't follow the steps exactly. My shit's foolproof, so obviously you're worse than a fool.
on Getting Laid at Farmer's Markets
over 3 years ago
I left it in the cab, actually.
on The "Free" Cab Ride
over 3 years ago
You're an actually terrible at sentencing, too.
on The Dudefest Company Softball Team